FIRST ENTRY

Been here for a couple of weeks already, but this morning it seems to have finally sinked in. Dreams Lake. The road was iced and filled with black snow at the curb. The traffic lights weren't working and another car crashed into mine. 

It wasn't an unusual sight to witness in Lover's Cross, despite only becoming a resident in this town a few weeks ago, it was one I'd seen many times already. 

Nevertheless, I had to stop on the side of the road. It wasn't even that serious. The car only had a small bump and nothing was truly broken. Still, my hands were shaking. I kept reminding myself that it had been a bad idea to come to this town (even though, I knew I didn't really think that).

By the time I calmed down, I couldn't remember why I'd even gone out. It didn't seem to matter too much anymore, anyways. 

When afternoon had truly sunk its claws into the day, I finally remembered. I'd gone out to buy a packet of cigarettes. After what had happened and with my car now sporting a new scar (that's what I kept calling it, trying to convince myself it'd be an entertaining story to tell in the future. I don't know who I'd tell, though), I didn't feel like going into town. All that I was left with was the hope they'd have cigarettes at Loony's. Loony's is a gas station just at the outskirts of town, not even two minutes away from my place. It's still hanging on to dear life with the few flickering neons that still work late when the sun falls. Not many of them do, the name reads "Oony's" at night. 

They sell everything your sleep deprived mind might need as well as make you fill up your car yourself while some bored young person chews bubblegum in their summer job. Or winter job, doesn't seem to matter.

The trip there was smooth. Went by the crossroads again, without any accidents this time. Still, my heart accelerated slightly for the minute it took me to cross it (the traffic lights were working now). 

The bored young guy at the counter of Loony's barely bothered with a glance when I asked him for a packet of cigarettes. I could empathise. He didn't seem to want to be here any more than me. I also asked about putting gas in my car and he informed me I'd have to wait since Jack Lowhorne was using the only pump that worked that day. Baffles me how a town this far into the mountain still seems so surprised when snow and ice make themselves at home in its streets and trees. 

"Lowhorne? The carpenter?" The young man had offered when he'd seen my face of confusion at the name. He'd expected me to recognise him, I realised. Did they already think I was one of their own? 

I felt a shiver run down my spine when I walked back out. I went straight to my car and waited behind Jack's van. It was pale white and had some ugly font at the sides in bright red that announced "IN LOWHORNE'S FIX-IT ALL, WE FIX IT ALL!". Not a very good slogan, but if it worked, it worked. Who was I to criticise it? My book titles hadn't been much better. 

Honestly, I'd wanted to avoid any kind of small talk, I stayed inside my car for this very reason, but I was not very lucky today. Jack saw me and waved at me (as if we had always known each other and I felt a tight feeling in my chest, shame at not having recognised his name when he was out here so warmly greeting me and I avoiding him), signalling me to come out. God, I hate small towns. I tried to banish the thought, telling myself that this was for the better, that I was here for a reason. 

Reluctantly, I got out and I could swear that for a second Jack's face... glitched, for lack of a better word. I don't know how else to describe it (I know, it's ironic coming from someone who is supposed to write for a living, hah). A shadow came over it, twisting and obscuring the features of the carpenter. 

"Hey, Daniel, was it? New town member, eh?" Jack asked in a cheery voice, as if nothing strange had just happened. I wanted to correct him, that was not my name. I tried to recover as quickly as I could from the sight of darkness, but evidently, it took me too long. The gas had stopped pouring into Jack's van and the only noise dancing around us was the merciless wind of a winter town. 

"Well, it was nice to see you, son. Take care, Daniel!" Jack said. That was not my name, goddammit! I tried to open my mouth to let him know that, but no sounds left me. A shadow came over his face as he grinned, waving me goodbye before getting into the van. In some strange way, the thought that he was resetting creeped into my mind. He drove off before I could even mutter that my name was Xavier. 

I looked back at the young man working the cash register, bewildered. He simply gave me a thumbs up, still looking as bored as he did 5 minutes ago, to let me know I could use the pump. Had he not seen there was something clearly wrong with Jack? 

I got gas and drove quickly back home. I never should have gone out today. I felt stiff, cold and the memory of the carpenter's face twisted by shadow followed me late into the night. The cigarettes lasted me only a day.